Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Armstrong, Livestrong, Die Stronger

Lance. Big surprise? Um, No.

Baseball: Bonds, Sosa, McGwire, Canseco, Petite, A-Rod, Clemens, their mothers, and their dogs.
Football: Spygate, Bounty Hunting, Brett Favre's cellular indiscretion, Vick and the aforementioned HGH dogs .
Golf: Tiger.
Basketball.
This guy
(ps. government too!)

As earth orbits the sun, so do professional athletes orbit scandal--they cannot elude its inescapable gravitational pull. Don't believe me? Watch Sportscenter for a week.

But now that performance enhancing drugs have since devoured Floyd Landis and latched their tentacles around cycling's golden boy, the public reaction has taken on a particular flavor. The public has taken two distinct sides. The Armstrong's cry fraudulent disqualification, the Livestrong's proclaim result-driven qualification. Neither will suffice. In times of blatant failure (defiant in Lance's case), only dying stronger than you "armstrong" or "livestrong" will suffice.

Armstrong
Public outrage is climaxing at this point. After years and years of scathing, indignant refutation, Lance finally admitted to what he so vehemently denied for at least a decade. As with the rest of our athletes who have fallen so far off the pedestal we insist on elevating them to, Lance's heart has proved to be black. And the public is ready to exile him. Strip the jerseys! Remove the medals! Exterminate the awards! Impeach him from his nonprofit! CONDEMN HIM. Rick Reilly, an ESPN sports columnist and close friend of Armstrong who defended Lance the past decade, outright rejects Lance's personal apology and condemns him by publicly and permanently burning the bridge they so freely traversed in the past. "It does not matter what he's done," the Armstrong's say. "On the inside he's a liar and a cheat, and he's disqualified!"

Livestrong
In the midst of disqualifying accusations, there's a murmuring of those who say, "Hold on a sec, he still qualifies. Look what he's done for cancer. Look what he's done for the sport. He's been such an inspiration!" One tweet reads, "Beat cancer, raise millions of dollars for cancer research, bring back a dead sport, then judge Lance #Armstrong. People piss me off." 55 million wristbands! Millions and millions of dollars for research! "It doesn't matter what he's like on the inside," the Livestrong's say. "It's the external that qualifies this man! Look at all he's done!"

Here's the problem: According to the public, Lance has fallen so far and so fast that there is absolutely nothing he can do to rid him of this permanent and career-wrecking stain. The internal condemnation is thick and heavy and it is not going anywhere. Additionally, the external can clearly do no good in transforming the internal. Lance ran his Livestrong campaign brilliantly while doping with EPO for all 7 Tour de France victories. Polished and sparkly outside, moral decay inside. The yellow wrist band I bought in 4th grade can't change Lance's heart. At least everyone thought I was cool.

So it seems that when we judge others and ourselves, we go one of two options:
1. We recognize we don't measure up. We see that we're total failures. We drown in the cesspools of guilt created by our moral failure. We convince ourselves that we are unlovable. We collapse under the weight of condemnation, and cling to anything we can get our hands on in a vain attempt to pawn off the perpetual weight of ongoing failure. When we find out others are just as bad or even worse than us (based on our own faulty perception of morality), we make sure we drag others down with us. With an undeserved pat on the shoulder and a fake fleeting smile, we leap frog ourselves up a rung on the moral ladder. "At least I'm not as bad as Lance! He's horrible! I'd never do that!"
2. We think we do measure up. We fight and claw for a pristine moral portfolio to present to God and to others, and insist that they accept us. The external justifies the internal. "I'm a pretty good person. I don't lie, cheat or steal. I'm not a murderer or a rapist." When others are caught in a scandal (especially in a scandal we ourselves could be guilty of), we fight for their external records. We do this because by fighting for their external qualifications, we're actually fighting for our own.
Die Stronger
There's always a 3rd way isn't there? Scripture doesn't leave us with either of these options. Road blocks both ways. The Bible tells us to ditch ourselves entirely. Death to self, life in Christ. The imputed righteousness of Jesus Christ simultaneously rescues us from our self-loathing, and deflates the limp balloon of our self-righteousness. Christ forbids our despair and scoffs at our efforts to measure up. There are no options of self left.
"For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin. Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him" (Romans 6:5-8) 
We ask frenetically with word and deed our entire lives, "How do I qualify??" As my friend answers, "Know you don't." As Tim Keller says, "The gospel is this: we are more sinful and flawed in ourselves than we ever dared believe, yet at the very same time we are more loved and accepted in Jesus Christ than we ever dared hope."

It is time to decisively push off shore from our tit-for-tat legalism and self-atoning that has been unfortunately familiar to us our entire lives. We don't sulk in abject despair. Nor do we run the unending race of moral manipulation. We fling ourselves overboard the USS Self entirely, and cling to the only Vessel capable of navigating the tempestuous seas of despair, confusion, desperation, frustration, pain, disappointment, anxiety, fear, sin, and death. The liberating power of the gospel is that our qualification no longer has anything to do with us. Our spiritual portfolios are filled with the riches of Christ. We're invited to joyfully jump off the cliff of safe moralism. The world says it's death. They're playing it safe. Risk is good. Jump. Christ is all. "Hallelujah, all I have is Christ. Hallelujah, Jesus is my life."

Saturday, May 26, 2012

I Want This

Marsden, commenting on the glories of God revealed to Edwards...

"The new sensibilities grew during the spring. As he wandered in the fields, woods, and hills near New Haven for his meditations he repeatedly saw the glory and beauty of God's love in Christ. He experienced an 'inward sweet sense' of Christ's love expressed in 'the work of redemption, and the glorious way of salvation by him.' He spent much time reading the love poetry of the Canticles or Song of Songs

..."The words seemed to me, sweetly to represent the loveliness and beauty of Jesus Christ." Such contemplations would carry him away 'from all the concerns of the world' into 'a kind of vision...sweetly conversing with Christ, and wrapped and swallowed up in God.' This new sense of divine things 'would often of a sudden as it were, kindle up a sweet buying in my heart; an ardor of my soul, that i know not how to express.'

What overwhelmed him was two seemingly opposite attributes of the triune God "in a sweet conjunction: majesty and meekness joined together: it was a sweet and gentle, and holy majesty; and also a majestic meekness; an awful sweetness; a high, and great, and holy gentleness."


...I'll have what he's having.

Sunday, May 13, 2012

He Refuses to Play That Game

1 Timothy 1:15-- "Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief."


Keller comments,

"Not I was chief, but I am chief. Or 'I am the worst.' This is off our maps. We are not used to someone who has incredible confidence volunteering the opinion that they are one of the worst people. We are not used to someone who is totally honest and totally aware of all sorts of moral flaws--yet has incredible poise and confidence.

We cannot do that. Do you know why? Because we are judging ourselves. But Paul will not do that. When he says that he does not let the Corinthians judge him nor will he judge himself, he is saying that he knows about his sins but he does not connect them to himself and his identity. His sins and his identity are not connected. He refuses to play that game. He does not see a sin and let it destroy his sense of identity. He will not make a connection. Neither does he see an accomplishment and congratulate himself...So, although he knows himself to be the chief of sinners, that fact is not going to stop him from doing all the things that he is called to do."


Tim Keller, The Freedom of Self-forgetfulness, p.30 (emphasis added)



Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Galatians 1:15-16; Jude 1:24

Galatians 1:15-16 "But when he who had set me apart before I was born, and who called me by his grace, was pleased to reveal his Son to me, in order that I might preach him among the Gentiles...

Jude 24 "Now to him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with great joy..."

It brings the Father pleasure and joy to both unite us with his son Jesus and present us as blameless before his glory. blameless. He's looking down on us in spite of all our screwiness, all our deficiency, all our lacking, all our frustration and insecurity, our confusion and shortsightedness, with pleasure and joy because of Christ. God delights in saving us.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Jesus: The End to Anxiety

Calvin famously assessed the nature of our human hearts by noting they are "factories of idols." Idolatry is essentially believing in other things to save us, and a functional disbelief in Jesus' salvific accomplishment at the cross. With this disbelief in Christ comes and overwhelming sense of anxiety. Transitively, one could then say, the human heart is a factory of anxiety--functional disbelief.

This manifests itself in so many ways. Those daily, repetitive, pestering questions of the sin-sick soul--"Am I good enough? How do I measure up to everyone around me? What do people think of me? Where the heck is my life going right now? What does the future hold? When am I going to meet the woman/man I will eventually marry? Am I being a good husband? Father? Wife? Mother? Where is my ministry going? Will it be successful? How will my finances ever work themselves out? Am I OK? 

Endless. Tiresome. Frenetic. On edge. Restless. Weary. Frustrated.

The festering angst of our souls finds storm quelling rest and peace in 2 Cor. 1:20 

"For all the promises of God find their Yes in him."

No matter what our past, present, or future holds, we have the approval from the only source that matters. In Jesus, we already have whatever we think we need to be OK. All of our life questions become of little significance in comparison to the soul-satisfying Yes we have in Jesus.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Freedom

Tullian Tchividjian:


The gospel frees us from this pressure to perform, this slavish demand to “become.” The gospel liberatingly declares that in Christ “we already are.” If you’re a Christian, here’s the good news: Who you really are has nothing to do with you—how much you can accomplish, who you can become, your behavior (good or bad), your strengths, your weaknesses, your sordid past, your family background, your education, your looks, and so on.
Your identity is firmly anchored in Christ’s accomplishment, not yours; his strength, not yours; his performance, not yours; his victory, not yours. Your identity is steadfastly established in his substitution, not your sin.

Monday, March 7, 2011

What Tullian Tchividjian Learned In Jonah

"I learned that God’s capacity to clean things up is infinitely greater than our human capacity to mess things up"

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Too Good Not To Repost

King's Cross. Chapter 5. The Power.

Keller, commenting on Mark 4:35-41


"Jesus says, 'One greater than Jonah is here,' and he's referring to himself: I'm the true Jonah. He meant this: Someday I'm going to calm all storms, still all waves. I'm going to destroy destruction, break brokenness, kill death. how can he do that? He can do it only because when he was on the cross he was thrown--willingly, like Jonah--into the ultimate storm, under the ultimate waves, the waves of sin and death. Jesus was thrown into the only storm that can actually sink us--the storm of eternal justice, of what we owe for our wrongdoing. that storm wasn't calmed--not until it swept him away.

If the sight of Jesus bowing his head into that ultimate storm is burned into the core of your being, you will never say, 'God, don't you care?' And if you know that he did not abandon you in that ultimate storm, what makes you think he would abandon you in the much smaller storms you're experiencing right now? And, someday, of course, he will return and still all storms for eternity. 


If you let that penetrate to the very center of your being, you will know he loves you. You will know he cares. And then you will have the power to handle anything in life with poise." (p. 57-58, my emphasis)


In the middle of any storm, even the most tempestuous hurricane, he is infinitely more powerful. He can, has, and will subdue the storm like a compliant child. In the midst of my storms, I have him, and he is more than enough. 




Saturday, February 19, 2011

A Strange Melancholy

Alexis de Tocqueville was a French aristocrat who lived in the 1800s. He was known as a political thinker, and his most famous work was Democracy in America. During his investigations of America and its political structure, he noted the following, as quoted in Tim Keller's Counterfeit Gods.
"A strange melancholy that haunts the inhabitants...in the midst of abundance..."
About one hundred years later C.S. Lewis stumbled upon the same conclusion:
"There is something we have grasped at, in that first moment of longing, which just fades away in the reality..." 
de Tocqueville concludes:
"the incomplete joys of this world will never satisfy the human heart."
And Lewis, simply and famously:
"something has evaded us."
Colossians 3:1-5 - Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry.

Incomplete joys. idolatry. Anything can be an idol, and just about everything has been. Its usually the best things that are.

Keller on rooting out our idols:
Idolatry is not just a failure to obey God, it is a setting of the whole heart on something besides God.   This cannot be remedied only by repenting that you have an idol, or using willpower to try to live differently. Turning from idols is not less than those two things, but it is also far more. 'setting the mind and heart on things above' where 'your life is hid with Christ in God' means appreciation, rejoicing, and resting in what Jesus has done for you. It entails joyful worship, a sense of God's reality in prayer. Jesus must become more beautiful to your imagination, more attractive to your heart, than your idol.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Sunday, February 6, 2011

My Heart Is Filled with Thankfulness

Came across this in church this morning. Peace to my soul.

Col 2:6-7 - "Let your lives overflow with thanksgiving for all he has done."


My heart is filled with thankfulness to him who bore my pain; who plumbed the depths of my disgrace and gave me life again; who crushed my curse of sinfulness, and clothed me in his light, and wrote his law of righteousness with pow'r upon my heart

My heart is filled with thankfulness to him who walks beside; who floods my weaknesses with strength and causes fear to fly; whose every promise is enough for every step I take; sustaining me with arms of love and crowning me with grace.

My heart is filled with thankfulness to him who reigns above; whose wisdom is my perfect peace, whose every thought is love. For every day I have on earth is given by the King. So I will give my life, my all, to love and follow him.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Your Own Making

"The depth of the wound is your own making" -Tim Keller

Whatever you are going through in life--whatever consumes your thought, soul, and deed in a negative way, is ultimately, our fault.

All external factors in this life can and will impose themselves on us, yes, in a negative way. The particular action--job loss, failure as a parent, failed class, broken relationship, unrequited love, broken or troubled marriage, general anxiety, physical illness, general disappointment, faulty finances, overworked, etc.-- may have been imposed on us in an unjust way to the point where we are the victim by any standard.

But-- to the extent that we let that event ravage our soul, to the extent that our okayness--our feeling of being justified--is linked to that particular event is our fault. 


The depth of that wound is a direct reflection of our distrust in Christ's sufficiency. Every time we are met with a form of struggle, we must filter it through the gospel. The world imposes it on us and it may be unjust, but the moment it reaches us the gospel is thoroughly sufficient to ease the anxiety of our souls.

Here's the beauty. The only thing that will ever span the chasm of our wounds are His wounds. Isaiah 53. period. Our hope is external. Our idolatry--no matter how rampant--cannot cannot cannot affect our ravishing hope that is in Christ Jesus. If it were up to us to apply that filter, we would be absolutely wrecked. Christ makes his glory and mercy so evident that he directly intercedes on our behalf. If it were up to me, I'd be screwed. Seriously. Praise be to God.

1 Peter 1:3-9 - Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God's power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith--more precious than gold that perishes through it is tested by fire--may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Romans 8, Redeemer Church, Kansas City

The following two quotes are from Jimmy Dodd, preaching on Romans 8

"The rugged hope of the believer is this: not that we will escape suffering or distress or peril or hunger or slaughter but that the almighty God will make every one of our agonies an instrument of His mercy to do us good so that when we see Jesus face to face it will make all our painful agonies in this life seem light and momentary"

"Is it wrong to be gripped with the state of our sinfulness? Only to the extent that we are gripped with the greatness of our Savior."

Why I'm Thinking of Naming My First Son Isaiah

In reading the ESV Study Bible's introduction to Isaiah, the key themes as summarized by Ray Ortlund opened my eyes to the beauty of the book. Isaiah's name means literally "Yahweh is salvation"

Key themes (for the sake of brevity, just a few)

  1. God is offended by religious ritual, however impressive, if it conceals an empty heart and a careless life (1:10-17, 58:1-12, 66:1-4)
  2. God's true people will become a multination community of worship and peace forever (2:2-4,19:19-25, 25:6-9, 56:3-8, 66:18-23)
  3. God opposes all manifestations of human pride (2:10-17, 10:33-34, 13:11, 16:6, 23:9, 28:1-4)
  4. Though God's judgment will reduce his people to a remnant, his final purpose is the joyful triumph of his grace (1:9, 6:1-12:6, 35:1-10, 40:1-2, 49:13-16, 51:3, 54:7-8, 55:12-13)
  5. The only hope of the world is bound up in one man--the promised Davidic king (4:2, 7:14, 9:2-7, 11:1-10), the lone victor over all evil (63:1-6)
Still gotta find a girl, but ill let you know when little Isaiah is on the way

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Be Strong, For I Will...

In Haggai's command to Zerubbabel, Joshua, and the people of God to rebuild the temple, we see holy orders fastened, guided, and supported by a holy God

Haggai 2:1-9

 In the seventh month, on the twenty-first day of the month, the word of the Lord came by the hand of Haggai the prophet, "Speak now to Zerubbabel the son of Shealtiel, governor of Judah, and to Joshua the son of Jehozadak, the high priest, and to all the remnant of the people, and say, 'Who is left among you who saw this house in its former glory? How do you see it now? Is it not as nothing in your eyes? Yet now be strong, O Zerubbabel, declares the Lord. Be strong, O Joshua, son of Jehozadak, the high priest. Be strong all you people of the land, declares the Lord. Work, for I am with you, declares the Lord of hosts, according to the covenant that I made with you when you came out of Egypt. My Spirit remains in your midst. Fear not. For thus says the Lord of hosts: Yet once more, in a little while, I will shake the heavens and the earth and the sea and the dry land. And I will shake the nations, so that the treasures of all nations shall come in, and I will fill this house with glory, says the Lord of hosts. The silver is mine, and the gold is mine, declares the Lord of hosts. The latter glory of this house shall be greater than the former, says the lord of hosts. And in this place I will give peace, declares the Lord of hosts.'"

So, we see the Lord saying by the hand of Haggai to

  1. "Be strong"
  2. "Work"
  3. "Fear not"
Yet these are not just strict orders to be followed blindly. We are to work hard, but with sweet, sweet assurances.

  1. "I am with you"
  2. "According to the covenant" 
  3. "I will give"
Life seems like the impossible task of rebuilding a broken, shattered templed with limited resources. Constantly attempting to repair a life with sinful minds and hearts which all too easily flee to the seemingly sweet pleasures of idolatry is a recipe that stirs the idolatrous cauldron of spiritual depression, anxiety, restless hearts, restless minds, restless bodies, and misguided affections.

Yet, where our sin abounds, grace abounds all the more. We are to work, for He is with us. According to the covenant fulfilled by Jesus Christ, with the freely given gift of salvation.

Re-read just the bold parts of the passage.

And he will, and he will, and he will give peace.


Sunday, January 9, 2011

Elect Exiles

We are aliens to this world. Our unsatisfied yearnings, festering idols, and distraught anxieties embody our alienation. Spiritual depression, and more broadly, sadness due to practical, functional unbelief result. What is the reason for our downcast souls? Where is our hope?

C.S. Lewis famously encapsulated this emptiness through this quote

"Most people, if they have really learned to look into their own hearts, would know that they do want, and want acutely, something that cannot be had in this world. There are all sorts of things in this world that offer to give it to you, but they never quite keep their promise. The longings which arise in us when we first fall in love, or first think of some foreign country, or first take up some subject that excites us, are longings which no marriage, no travel, no learning, can really satisfy. I am not now speaking of what would be ordinarily called unsuccessful marriages, or holidays, or learned careers. I am speaking of the best possible ones. There was something we have grasped at, in that first moment of longing, which just fades away in the reality. I think everyone knows what i mean. The wife may be a good wife, and the hotels and scenery may have been excellent, and chemistry may be a very interesting job: but something has evaded us."
Just as our basic hunger points to the existence of food, so does this spiritual vacancy point to an eternally satisfying occupant.

Our answer is found in 1 Peter. Immediately addressed to the "elect exiles," Peter wastes no time in comprehensively addressing our exile. A few things:

  1. Our exile is rooted in and guided by the Holy Trinity - 1:1-2 "To those who are elect exiles, according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, in the sanctification of the Spirit, for the obedience to Jesus Christ and for sprinkling with his blood."
  2. A continual return to the cross - 1:3-4  "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God's power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time."
  3. Sovereign, glorious grace - It is by His sovereignty that we are met with spiritual depression, and for the sake of His glory, the process is sufficiently founded by endless, abundant grace resulting from Christ crucified. 1:13  "set your hope full on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ."
Therefore in the midst of trial, depression, idolatry, unbelief, hopelessness, etc, We have something far greater operating outside our ridiculous hearts and minds, continually redeeming our wayward tendencies. We have an endless reservoir of grace--living hope. Our hope, the eternal satisfaction that our souls truly long for, is provided through the glory and grace of Jesus.